5 Reasons You Need To Stop Feeling Inferior

Subash Rajan
5 min readAug 4, 2022

--

This is something that's spoken less of. Nobody is comfortable talking about it and maybe it's out of the fear of being seen as sensitive and touchy-touchy. You know that I don't care.
Let's go.

The problem of people having low self-worth is huge.

They are everywhere. I see this as a parental problem. It is the core reason some act like dicks(to cover up), some go to bed depressed and some commit crimes.

It is a human tendency to underestimate oneself and overestimate others.
It is an inbuilt error of calculation.

This cannot be cured by consuming a bunch of motivational videos or quotes. But it can be dealt with in a more interesting and sustainable way.

#5 People Just Join You:

People just join you in whatever that you do to yourself.
The way you treat yourselves does 2 things:
1. Changes the way you think about yourselves
2. Changes the way others treat you

It is one of the profound wisdom my long night walks gave me.

People have no clue about you. Give them the answer. You show them the way you should be treated and promptly let them know when they do it wrong.

It is high time that you realize you are the gatekeeper. Stop blaming it on others. They are not abusive, it's just that you are submissive.

#4 Everybody Is Flawed:

Stop comparing your life with someone else's on Instagram.

Social media is just a dream of skewed reality.

It's a modern problem and is huge. We are terribly hyper-exposed to ‘successful’ people more than ever in history.

I don't understand why people feel the need to follow that famous person on the internet who does nothing but posts bikini pictures with motivational captions.

There is a daily constant reminder that you have done nothing and your life ain’t special. Now that you see all those people who are always on vacation in perfect outfits and costly restaurants, you think there is something wrong with you.

No.

Consciously control your exposure. Mute.

I am not an all-enlightened saint who never feels jealous of other people. In fact, I get this feeling in a slightly bigger proportion because of my competitiveness. But I am sane enough to use that or ignore that altogether.
I ask this whenever I feel strongly jealous.

Is this person worth knowing more about?

Yes? What can I learn?
No? Mute.

This is the way I turn my envy into curiosity.

Appreciating others in spite of that temporary rush of jealousy needs a certain level of confidence and character and not many people have this. I encourage you to think about it.

That hottest girl you are jealous of is most probably the most insecure, superficial, dumb, and terrified of people not giving a damn about her.

That charismatic and funny guy with the cheat code ‘fanny magnet’ you are envious of probably has all the fucked up habits that are ruining his life and his family.

That studious person you are jealous of is maybe under extreme parental pressure and terribly depressed.

Everybody has darkness. Just like you.
Some are just good at hiding them.

#3 Your Weirdness Is What Makes You ‘You’:

You are terrified of being rejected.

Dead scared of being seen as a weirdo. Though you may not want to admit it, you are always trying to fit in. That's the default.

You stop doing all your quirky things. You let that inner kid starve.

But.

You do not want to wait till you realize the magnitude of this mistake.
Not being yourselves is a suicide.

Say what you think.
Do what you want.
Never feel shameful about it.
Ever.

If being you makes your tribe disown you, it wasn't yours in the first place.
Find yours.

#2 Insecurities Are Real Strength:

I never had the common insecurity of unworthiness. I am a driven person who knows what he wants and gets it.

I never had social insecurity too because being social was how I impressed my father growing up.

But, I had physical insecurities even in my late teens and a bit further. I was fat growing up. Also, I am not that tall. It was a huge hit on my self-esteem. I got bullied heavily for that. I resented myself. I hated how my posture used to be while walking just so it could make my tummy look small.

Funny.

Soon I figured it out. I cut down all the junk. I cut down on my food. Went on cycling. Hit the gym. Lost weight and felt like a different person.
I gained respect for myself.

The fat thing was something that I could change.

Nothing I could do about my height.
I was stuck in constant comparison and it was such a mindfuck.
It made me feel less of myself.

It took a long time.

To realize this is my strength. This was a huge opportunity to improve my self-acceptance. This is what made me, ‘me’.

I highly encourage you to take a pen and paper. Write about all your insecurities. Play with them. And change the narratives around them. It doesn't happen by accident. It needs work.

Never let people tell you how you should feel about yourself.

Those who view themselves as above their flaws are miles ahead of those born without any.
-Project Impero

#1 You Are Not The Whole Point:

I'm not into practicing self-love or endorsing the same.
Self-love is just making a narcissist out of everybody.

You are not the whole point.

Stop making everything about yourself by constantly regurgitating about all the ways you are inferior to others and how your life sucks.
Jump out of your sphere and actually focus on others.

I know it’s cliche but nobody cares about you more than you do.
Stop being self-obsessed by staying sad and start doing something.

The world needs you more than you think. Does it care about, you thinking that you are short and your nose ain't cute? Fuck no.

It is waiting to see your contribution, not your complaints.

Life is already difficult and full of challenges.
Why on earth would you add to it?

Much love,
Subash.

Cover art by my friend Ashitha Ashok. Check out her other works here.

Follow me on Twitter for more

--

--

Subash Rajan

A medical student from India. I write about my struggles and the resulting weird introspections.